by Kelly Pickerill

The world sometimes seems divided into cat lovers and dog lovers; dog lovers (and, I guess, everyone else who isn’t a cat lover) don’t often understand the fascination cat lovers have with their feline friends. Why is a creature who carefully ignores you, who enjoys shredding furniture and curtains, and who can’t wait to shed a pound of fur all over your freshly cleaned laundry so beloved? Well at Lemuria cat lovers can geek out this week because a new book published by Chronicle has just arrived: I Could Pee on This is a poetry book written by cats for the humans who adore them.

We’ve been giving dramatic readings at the store that have ended in giggles, but don’t take my word for it — take Mittens’s:

“And Now We Know”

Nine-hundred-and-ninety-five

I’m doing this for you

Nine-hundred-and-ninety-six

So please don’t interrupt

Nine-hundred-and-ninety-seven

I’m just keeping them honest

Nine-hundred-and-ninety-eight

So please do take note

Nine-hundred-and-ninety-nine

And now thanks to me we all know

There really were one thousand sheets

in this toilet paper roll

You won’t find any Lehrer-like misquotations in this book; the ghostwriter, Francesco Marciuliano, faithfully represents the feline attitude. If that’s not enough cat indulgence for you, this book of poetry complements some of our other books in the cat genre:

Crafting with Cat Hair, a book in which you can find many uses for the copious amounts of fur Fluffy sloughs off on your couch, is great for the avid felter and cat fan who is tired of being restricted by wool — who says felt should be solely the sheep’s domain?

And one of my favorites: Why Cats Paint, in which you can explore the aesthetic theory of feline art. The book studies the work of twelve cat artists, arguing that the markings of a cat can be interpreted as more than, well, markings. If you dip Tiger’s paws in paint you may just find that he’s the next feline Picasso (or rather, Pollock).

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